Vote Early, Vote Often (But Not Like That)

In the bustling metropolis of Ballotburg, where campaign signs sprouted like weeds and yard signs declared eternal fealty to candidates named after household appliances, the Election Commission unveiled their magnum opus: the Quantum Vote-O-Matic 3000. It was billed as the future of democracy—a digital voting system so advanced it could tally votes in real-time, detect fraud with AI precision, and even brew coffee if you asked nicely. Or so the press release claimed. Commissioner Eliza Fudge, a woman whose hairdo resembled a ballot box exploded mid-count, stood at the podium during the launch event. "Ladies and gentlemen, transparency is our middle name! Well, actually, it's Gertrude, but you get the point. With the QVOM-3000, every vote will be as clear as mud—er, crystal! No more hanging chads or butterfly ballots. This baby runs on blockchain, quantum entanglement, and a dash...

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